Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Not quite ready

Okay, here's the deal. I'm not going to make a decision because I am not ready quite yet. I hate the thought of any animal in a shelter but I shouldn't take one home just because I feel bad for them. Both of those dogs are highly adoptable and they may be gone before the week is out.

I could barely sleep last night. DH kept pushing me to look at pictures cause he knows that my "maybe one day" would be "maybe never" and I know he's ready, but since I'm going to be doing most of the work, I'm going to table this one til later. DH even had a new name picked out! OHN makes a good point - when are we ever ready about anything - even a giant dog with the head the size of a basketball? I'm definitely not ready for both a puppy and a one year old Newfie! The pound won't let you do that anyway. You have to fill out an application for one dog at a time. I think I realized I wasn't ready when we drove up to the pound and I had a knot in my stomach and my shoulders were up to my ears. Yet even this experience has been good for me - it opened up the possibility that I could have another dog in this space. I remembered all the fun time we had walking with our dog in the woods, and watching him play in the water. Along with the hair and the slobber comes the reward of a sloppy kiss or the manic welcome at the door.

Thanks for all your encouragement and words of wisdom. It really helped a lot.


Pamela T. said...

I'm late to the conversation here, but I'm all for giving yourself some space and knowing better your state of readiness...

annacyclopedia said...

I'm proud of you for respecting your heart in all of this, sweetie. It was really brave to go to the pound and see dogs and imagine life with them, and extra brave to accept how things are for you right now. I truly believe you will be ready someday, and I know this whole experience was a step toward that.

Wordgirl said...

A wise person I know once told me to walk through the fear and into the joy?

Not necessarily two dogs of joy (that's a lot of dog hair!) -- but opening to the possibility -- that sounds wonderful.

I am thinking of you my friend.