Thursday, December 13, 2007

Working it out

I'm so excited!!!! Today, I am going to be working on set with Charles "Roc" Dutton. It's rare that I get to work with a black director, so I'm all excited that I have a cool part. I play a woman in the projects with information the police need to catch a suspect in a shooting. I have to watch my American accent on this one, though. Yes, it's true, Canadian blacks don't sound anything like American blacks. At least in TV land anyway. You have no idea how many times I get the "you don't sound black enough" comment. Sad, but true, it's something Canadians (black or otherwise) have to mimic in order to get parts on American shows. Though years ago, I made the decision that I would not do any degrading or stereotypical roles in my work, those roles are still out there. I just hope this pilot airs so I can make a bit more money.

So a couple days ago, while I was having a rehearsal for the play I'm directing at my place, hubby goes out to hang with a friend. So of course, he comes home and he's semi-baked. I'm totally pissed and go to bed practically shaking with anger. I explained to him that he was either deliberately pissing me off or ignoring my feelings. Blah, blah, blah. The next morning, I discover him asleep on the couch waiting for me to get up so he could talk with me. He told me that he took my "I'm doing this for myself" attitude too personally. (Even though he had said I should be losing weight and moving forward in my life for myself and not him.) Hence, he responded by doing his own thing.

So we went all through this and other things in our therapy session that afternoon. We're on the same page about a lot of things. Now that I've dropped trying to figure out his shit for him and focused solely on myself, he seems much more interested in investing in our relationship. And he wants to find out our next step in our adoption process. We don't have another appointment for a month or so, so our homework is trying to do things that help us feel close again. Teendcoc has given me a book suggestion, so I'll check it out. I'll let you know how my day on set goes . Currently, it's actually snowing/raining out at the moment and I have to be outside. Brrr!


Lori Lavender Luz said...

This acting gig sounds like a good one -- hope all goes well. I'm learning so much from you about The Business.

You're probably not looking for any more book suggestions, but one I like is "Dancing in the Dark: the shadow side of intimate relationships" (

Stay warm!

Natalie said...

The husband stuff is sounding good, I'm hopeful for you. Good for you for taking care of you:-)

OHN said...

Why is it when we start to become more independent and live for ourselves the men in our lives all of a sudden notice we are here and scramble to get us to notice them again. I swear it doesn't matter how old they are...they are ALL 14 at heart.

Anonymous said...

I love the sound of the new acting situation. I can totally believe that someone would tell you that you don't "sound black enough". I'm from New England and I always hear that I don't sound 'Boston' enough or 'yankee' enough... grrrr

Pamela T. said...

Hey -- goodness on all fronts. Good opportunity, good discussions and a good book recommendation. Nice!