45 is the new 35!

Thank you for your birthday wishes - I absolutely adore birthday wishes. My tremendous ego likes to get stuffed on the one day you're allowed special attention.

It's funny, I used to make a big brouhaha over my birthday, thanks to my early years when my mother would sing to me and make a big deal over my birthday. I guess it was a big deal for her as she had to do the birthing after all. For years, I would wake to the ringing phone of my mother's call singing me the happy birthday song. She doesn't spontaneously remember anymore, but I remind her now and I still get my song.

Now as I pass from one age bracket to another, (choke, choke!)I have to remind myself to be grateful that I even get to do that. I'm fortunate to even be older. Life is good. Thanks to my UFE procedure, my monthly period is so scant I get to use Tampax Lites. No more charting, no more thinking "what if", no more if I make that cute black girl my friend maybe she'll give me her eggs thoughts. Kidding.

I went to a women's chanting session yesterday and and the daimoku felt like horses galloping through my heart. As I watch my mother and my beloved dog, Sampson, get older and struggle, I realize that I need to be stronger. There are going to be lots of challenges ahead. Will I be ready to meet them? I've let so much slide away. I need to train harder. I got a list of bad habits a mile long, but today is not the day to list them. Today is my birthday, and when I look in the mirror and see the grey hairs, here, there and OMG, even there, I will also see someone who survived. She fell down, but she got up. She might have the old war injury that aches when it rains, but most of the time, she is getting stronger every day. She has a smile that still lights up a room.

And on that note - I'm gonna get this sore gluteus maximus (thanks spinning class) in gear and get out the door. I've got shit to do.